|Report From The Arctic|
|Written by Dave Thomas|
|Friday, 24 February 2012|
Report From The Arctic
Oh what fun we’ve had battling with computer technology. We ended up back to square one at the end of January tearing our hair out because the new machine we got (to replace the one that took 3 days to boot up) lasted three days before it too decided to go into ‘rogue’ mode.
So first: the new machine lost Word. This was within three days. They guy at back-up helped Mrs T get it back… a morning’s work whilst at the same time the guy from the alarm firm was testing the alarms and they were going off. I was sent out of the room on the grounds that I am less use than a chocolate teapot when it comes to fixing computers. It’s an add-on that’s corrupted something said the guy in Nottingham. What f*****g add-on, we haven’t added any?
Then AOL went missing and wouldn’t let itself be downloaded again. Ah said the guy at back-up something has corrupted itself. It’s just normal teething problems with a new computer. It happens a lot. The word bollocks sprang to mind. He helped Mrs T get it running again; another morning gone.
Surely it’s gonna be Ok now we thought. Well no actually; it decided that a fun game would be to sort of go to sleep when your back was turned but when you wiggled the mouse the screensaver would come on – but no desktop icons or task bar. This was always when you’d done an hour’s work and then left the room. I swear it knew the minute you left the office.
We might be retired but for various reasons we don’t have much spare time… so the one free day we had, a Tuesday by chance, the Nottingham game, we spent 5 hours making two visits to PC World (cos you can’t phone them direct)… hanging about while the machine was tested… wandering round the adjoining Chain Stores, marvelling at the stuff on offer in Poundland… and in next door Poundstretcher, eating a large subway sandwich and wondering how to reply to the guy who took the order and asked were we having a nice day.
So: while we munched on tuna baguettes our machine on the test bench crashed. The obnoxious and very fat (he looked more like a darts player) store manager had grumpily told us that we had to prove it was faulty before they would even talk about a replacement. Oh and I thought everybody had a statutory 28 days to return items. Not PC World. It’s 21 here, said Mr Grumpy. He had also explained that they didn’t take calls from customers because of all the abuse they got. “You surprise me,” I thought. I would have been happy to ram the defunct machine up his flash drive and kick him in the dongles.
And then it was good news time. The model we had bought was a special offer package. There were no more. There was nothing as good at the same price. No wonder they were special offer, they didn’t pigging work did they? Yep you’ve guessed; it cost us another £100 to get a replacement. And – there wasn’t one in stock. To cut a long story short there wouldn’t be a replacement for at least a week… of the model that was the nearest in price to the b*****d thing we’d taken back.
And we signed a left-back. It did give me a shock when I saw the header – Lafferty signs for Burnley. What a mood there was then, the day after Nottingham. The squad intact, a new left back, two points off top six and smiles all round. But who’d be a Forest supporter as they linger at the bottom in an increasingly vulnerable position. You wonder too just where it’s all gone wrong for Steve Cotterill, from being BYMOTP at Burnley to figure of fun at Forest. Back here at Turf Moor Towers there are varying views of him. I’m in the camp that says he did a damned good job for the first couple of years.
And Eddie Howe what can you say? From November bottom six candidates to January top six contenders. Dare we say he is indeed laying some very firm foundations? A few superlatives are beginning to appear in match day reports and on websites. Rodders’ headed goals brought comparisons with Tommy Lawton who allegedly could put spin on the ball or used to look one way and head the ball the other to fool the goalkeeper. I’ll guess Andy Lochhead was full of approval. What Jay does possess is the ability to leap and hover. It’s a rare gift.
There was a PC World in the city centre. I noticed a big burly security guard in the doorway. Apparently they’re not there to stop people taking goods out. They’re there to stop people taking faulty goods back in. Then it was back to the bus station via Leeds Market to get the bus home. The driver seemed to think he was Lewis Hamilton as prams, shopping bags and old ladies slithered about the bus every time he braked suddenly, or accelerated away from bus stops. Leeds though, on the whole, is a decent place. It’s just a pity they have such an obnoxious football club. They seem totally the opposite of us –
How then would you define Burnley? According to Paul Rowling it’s, “small club big heart.” What other ‘small’ club takes 2,000 supporters to an away game. It’s the perfect summary and covers all the years that I’ve been a supporter and all eventualities and situations, be they ups or downs. It was like the moment I saw the guy in Leeds with his bobble hat on. I just had to go over for a chat. It was like meeting a brother.
|Last Updated ( Monday, 05 March 2012 )|
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